America is nothing if not a nation full of quirks, with phallic symbols near the halls of power (how you doing, Washington Monument). Sometimes the lewdness is even more overt, especially if you've got a dirty mind. For example, there are multiple towns with the name Virgin and Rough and Ready dotted across the nation. If the latter doesn't make you think of condoms, congratulations. You are propriety personified. We've gathered more town names to tickle your funny bone below.
The city of Bald Knob may be known as the place "where the Ozarks meet the Delta," but with a name like that, it may as well be known as the place where 12-year-old boys are guaranteed to guffaw.
Nearby Blue Ball got its name thanks to former resident Salina Millard who thought the mountain she could see from her home looked like, well, a large blue ball. Ouch is all we've got to say about that! The Natural State also has a city called Weiner for good measure.
In the mood for some toilet humor? Head for Kaka in Maricopa County. And if you had to come across the city of Show Low during a road trip with a couple of children in tow, you might be inclined to yell, "Close your eyes, kids!" But don't worry—your offspring's innocence should live to see another day.
Show Low got its name from a poker game between two early settlers, in case you're wondering what happened there.
With rumors that some of San Francisco's streets are named after 19th-century sex workers and the San Fernando Valley's notoriety for producing porn, the Golden State has a bit of a rep. It should come as no surprise then that California has such on-theme destinations as Chubbuck, Clam Beach, Johnsondale, Fort Dick, and Hooker.
Hooker is named for pioneer J.M Hooker, not a prevailing community-wide love for illegal prostitution, by the way.
The Centennial State is known for having a dry climate—that might explain why Colorado has a low-key obsession with wetness. From Lubers in the eastern part of the state to Wetmore, an hour south of Colorado Springs, there are plenty of thirsty town names to put a smirk on your face.
Meanwhile, the town of Lay is so named because of Lieutenant McCalla. He had a sweetheart, Miss Lay, who lived all the way in Chicago. Not content with mere daydreaming, McCalla named his camp after his future wife.
So much for Southern manners. We all know Georgia is fixated on peaches, so some eggplant and sweat droplet emojis must be in the mix too. But the complete lack of subtlety in town names like Butts County, Boneville, Cumming, and Flippen will have you questioning local manners.
It turns out gentlemen of yore have funny surnames. Samuel Butt was a Creek War veteran whose bravery earned him much praise among the locals.
The Hawkeye State certainly has an eye for eyebrow-raising town names. Baby-making is seemingly a full-time pursuit if Balltown, Sac City, and Fertile are anything to go by. There's also Beaverdale, and our personal favorite, Hard Scratch.
Sac City refers to the Sac and Fox Indians who once owned the land. This town really is ball crazy. It's held a record for the world's most gigantic popcorn ball, and the latest attempt weighed a whopping 9,370 pounds.
The ghost town, Sugartit, used to be known as Gunpowder and Pleasant Ridge before that. You're not the only one sensing a pattern here. This ghost town must have seen and heard its fair share of bangs over the years. Elsewhere in the Bluegrass State, town names like Morehead, Load, and Broad Bottom might make you blush too.
It appears that Sugartit got its name because the farmers would spend a lot of time at a local general store rather than at home. The wives joked about the store keeping sugar tits, a previous iteration of the baby pacifier.
The Land of 10,000 Lakes has tens of bawdy place names—some of the towns could moonlight as Urban Dictionary pages.
Golden Rod comes to mind, as does Bush Landing. How about Clappers, Remer, Underwood, or Embarrass? Embarrass is a French word meaning "to confuse." French explorers were at times stumped by the river and proceeded to call it Embarrass River, and the rest, unfortunately, is history.
The Land of Enchantment is pretty classy, would you believe? The closest it gets too raunchy with its proper nouns is in Pie Town, which got its moniker from wholesome apple pies, and Truth or Consequences, which pays homage to an NBC radio show. T or C, as it's better known, renamed itself in 1950. But, get this—it used to be called Hot Springs.
New Mexico sure left the unrefined Cockeysvilles and Crapos to its neighbors.
A far cry from New Mexico, the Buckeye State is not shy to plaster the ridiculous across its maps and official stationery. Sure, Knockemstiff and Spunky Puddle are ghost towns, but what's your excuse Pee Pee Township? Did a toddler name you? Because the one in the backseat just dissolved into giggles at the very mention of your existence.
Turns out, some genius (can you detect a hint of sarcasm?) scribbled his initials into a tree trunk along the river bank back in the 18th century. So Philip Partridge or Patrick Perry or whoever you are, we hope you recognize how ill-fated your actions were for future generations who'll cringe in the halls of Harvard and Cambridge when asked where they're from.
Leave it to the Beaver State to get straight to the point. Oregon doesn't have time for Lovings and Youngwoods or Wartburgs and Sweet Lips's. No. It's more of a Climax and Wankers Corner kind of place.
Wankers Corner's origin story isn't as exciting as you'd imagine. Again, a family moved in during the 19th century, and they had an unfortunate, albeit cackle-worthy, name.
There's a Fingerville, and a Ninety-Six in the Palmetto State, which would be fine were our minds not in the gutter. The perfectly demure would see nothing to blink about. Ninety-Six derived its name in the 18th century when traders believed the closest Cherokee village to be 96 miles away.
Depending on who you ask, ding dong is the sound a doorbell makes, or it's a euphemism for a penis. There's a teeny tiny community in Central Texas bearing the name Ding Dong. It resulted from an uncle and nephew team who operated a store about a century ago—their surname was Bell. There's also a place called Tool in the Lone Star State.
Here's yet another example of the South giving politeness a kick on its behind. Virginia has no shortage of naughty place names. From Assawoman and Bumpass to Onancock and Short Pump, the Old Dominion is rife with wink-wink nudge nudges. In the 1830s, a teenager called Ira Coltrane figured there'd be a better coach route through the Blue Ridge Mountains. Hence, Fancy Gap was born.
Few Places will stir up chuckles like the Mountain State. Kinky place names abound, and you'll have to visit them to find out which ones live up to their titillating titles. There's Cougar Valley if you're on the hunt for a May-December romance. Or why not check out, erm, Longpole?